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Showing posts with label feminism. Show all posts
Showing posts with label feminism. Show all posts

Sunday, January 18, 2015

Is the term "Conservative Feminist" an oxymoron?



If you were to ask me my political views, I would unashamedly declare myself a conservative. If you were to ask me if I was a feminist, I would also unashamedly answer yes. Many people do not understand how these two terms can go together. And quite frankly, I can't blame them. It is unfortunate that the modern feminist movement has been hijacked by liberals who support abortion and government-supplemented birth control. It is unfortunate that many of my friends believe feminists are promoting female superiority, rather than gender equality. 
Merriam-Webster defined feminism as "the belief that men and women should have equal rights and opportunities". Now tell me, does any of that sound bad to you? Unless you're somehow from the 1800's, my guess is that you answered no. So why does the term feminism now come with such a stigma? Why can't I call myself a feminist without getting bad looks? 
The unfortunate truth is that the faces of modern feminism are representing all the wrong things. We have people such as Lena Dunham and Hilary Clinton who are leading today's feminists. I absolutely hate that. When I call myself a feminist, I hate to think that someone associates me with these women. 
I know several people who think that Lena Dunham is an inspiring woman that we should all idolize. WHY?? Her claim to feminism fame is that she was apparently raped after a party. Yes, rape is awful.  But Lena Dunham claims to have been raped whilst she was very drunk and high on substances such as cocaine and adderall. There is a big push in feminism that because a girl isn't able to say no, it still means no. This essentially means that if a girl is drunk or high or passed out or something like that, she should not be sexually abused. This sounds all fine and dandy, but I feel like it is taking all responsibility off of women. If you don't want to be raped, don't drink! Don't do drugs! Yes it's still a horrible thing that guys do that.. but what if the guys were drunk or high as well? If the woman doesn't have to take responsibility for her actions whilst under the influence, why does a man? But the even bigger issue is that Lena Dunham's story has recently been debunked. I think her fake rape story is an insult to real rape victims. 
Don't even get me started on Hillary Clinton. She one of the biggest supporters of Planned Parenthood. I consider this organization to be degrading and insulting to women. I simply don't understand how people can consider abortion as a form of birth control. In my opinion, birth control should be preventative. But that is for a different day.
Because these women are the faces of modern feminism, I have many conservative friends who think feminism is bad, or unnecessary. A frequent thing I hear women say is that "feminism was necessary in the 20's so that women could gain the right to vote, but it's just not necessary anymore" or "I've never experienced any oppression or sexism in my  lifetime." So... because you've never experienced something personally, this means it doesn't exist? In the U.S. alone, there are still women fighting to get equal pay. There are women being sexually harassed in the work place and women being raped. There are women experiencing domestic violence and household abuse who stand powerless. Outside the U.S., there are countries like Saudi Arabia where women are legally segregated from men in public. Our country wasn't okay with racial segregation in the 60's, so why are we okay with gender segregation elsewhere? There are countries like Egypt where fathers and brothers of certain Muslim groups can perform 'honor killings' on women and not even be arrested or tried. And you're going to try and tell me the world doesn't need feminism? 
Unacceptable. 
Here is my proposal- We get back to the true meaning of feminism. We don't tolerate unequal treatment of women, but we also don't bash on men whilst doing so. 
We need to recognize and support true and worthy feminists such as Raheel Raza, Fahima Hashim, and the many other wonderful people who are working so hard to create an equal world. 
We also need to support all kinds of women. I feel as if modern feminists only support the ideal 'modern woman' who doesn't need a man to be happy. You know the sort, the woman who doesn't want to get married or have kids because she is independent. Sure, we can support those women, but can't we also support the stay at home mom who lets her husband work for the family? The woman who actually cooks and cleans a house not because she has to, but because she wants to? I propose that we stop bashing so many people in the name of Feminism. 
Help me promote equality around the world. Help me call myself a feminist without shame or guilt. Help me to help the women who are suffering around the world. Don't be afraid to call yourself a feminist. 

Please let me know your opinions on this topic!

If you are interested in the subject, I recommend watching the movie The Honor Diaries. It shows the oppression of women in certain Muslim countries. 

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Why more feminists (and people in general) should be opposed to pornography

Just a few comments before I launch into this:
I know this isn't anything like my typical posts, but I feel very strongly about this subject and felt I should voice my opinions.



While I wouldn't consider myself a full-fledged, man-hating feminist, I am very passionate about women's rights. For centuries, women have fought for equal treatment. It has been only this last century that the significant shifts on the views of women have occurred. In the 1800's, women started to fight to be viewed as more than mothers and vehicles to please men. In the 1900's, women started to fight for the right to vote and work. Now, in the country I live in, I can confidently say that women have equal rights as men. There are, of course, exceptions to that statement. However, I believe women have the opportunity to accomplish anything they want to here in America.
So why, then, do we allow pornography to destroy the hard work we have strived for so long to achieve? 
I will admit that I may be a bit biased because my church teaches against pornography. However, I think I am taking a secular view point for this post. 

Here's what's so bad for women about pornography: It teaches men that women are merely objects used for pleasure. It teaches men how to speak to us, how to handle us, and how to use our bodies for their own personal pleasure. I don't know about you, but my body is capable of a lot more than that. I have the abilities to produce and nurture children, serve and help others, and do basically anything I want. MY BODY WAS NOT MADE SIMPLY FOR SEX.
I am repulsed by the thought of a man looking at my body, a miraculous and beautiful creation in every way, simply for sex. I will not tolerate a man to view me that way, and I'm sure many of you feel the same. 
Why do we allow men to do that to other women? 
Imagine if the women in these porno films were your mothers and sisters. The thought is utterly repulsive, right? Well the truth is that these women are someone's daughters, someone's sisters. Of course, these women made the choice to participate in these films. But I find it sad that they even have that choice. I find it sad that pornography brings in more money total than regular Hollywood films.

This issue is creeping out into society. I walked into the grocery store the other day and browsed through the magazines while waiting to checkout. I saw a Cosmopolitan magazine with the words "Men only need two things: sex and a grilled cheese" in large, bold letters. I turned to another magazine that said "50 hot new sex moves to please your man". 
Now, I know my view on this matter may be a bit different than most. I am unashamed to admit that I am saving that part of myself for marriage. 
But the messages these magazines told appalled me. A man only needs sex and grilled cheese? There is nothing else I can offer him? Not my love, my support, my advice? 
50 moves to please my man? Not 50 tips to strengthen your relationship? Am I really nothing more to a man than sex? 
I know this is not true. But pornography is teaching both men and women that it is true.
I want to clarify that I am not preaching against sex. It's true that physical intimacy is an important part of marriage. But pornography is turning this intimacy into a vulgar, violent act. The sex in porn is not real. It's calculated, edited, and made to perfection. Porn is creating unrealistic expectations for women and sex.
Porn is ruining the beautiful image of women. I don't go a day at school without hearing guys talking about girls in a vulgar manner. They look at my peers, beautiful, talented girls full of potential, and all they see is a "nice pair of  t*ts" or a "big 'ole booty". They talk about girls they know and remark only on their appearance or their sexual abilities. These girls have potentially wonderful things in front of them, but all the guys see are their bodies. I know countless amounts of girls who have sent nude photos of themselves to guys to get their attention. Girls are being taught that this is the way to get a guy. But that isn't a real relationship. I hate to break it to you girls, but the guy doesn't love you, he just loves your body. 
Pornography is changing our views of women and the dynamic of relationships.
I don't want to offend anyone with this overgeneralization. It is, of course, true that women can have a problem with pornography. But it is a much bigger problem among men because they are much more easily addicted to it.


There are many other horrible consequences of pornography, like how it effects and damages you physically, mentally and emotionally. I could go into significant detail about these and would upon request. But I felt I needed to talk about its affects on women because that is what most directly impacts me.

You may think pornography is harmless, but it's not. Porn is destroying the image of women.

**I found this poem extremely eye-opening, but felt it was too graphic to write directly on this post. If you feel comfortable doing so, please take the time to read it:
https://medium.com/@alexlenkei94/tell-me-what-happens-the-first-time-you-see-a-woman-naked-59d56017e799

For more information about the harmful effects of pornography, visit:
http://fightthenewdrug.org/get-the-facts/#sthash.IP7sXpod.dpbs